Dress Up 2

The first Fantastic Four movie was kinda meh. The thing was a big rubber power rangers villain (this guy is supposed to be able to go toe to toe with The Hulk remember) and Doctor Doom was that guy from Nip Tuck...... the less said about that the better. Chris Evans as the Human Torch was good but lets face it....it was a bit crappy. Fantastic Four 2 was also meh. They had Galactus as a villain but they didn't show him. WTF? This is a giant robot looking' guy with a massive purple helmet (*ahem*) who EATS planets.....how awesomely insane would that be in a movie? Apparently too awesome for Fox to show us.  Here's how I imagine he should have made his grand entrance in the third act of the movie....

Expresso

I always thought it was weird that Starbucks had that 2 lobster clawed lady as their logo. Then I found out that it was actually a mermaid.....with 2 tails. You can see the original 'starbucks siren' design below (from http://www.logodesignlove.com/starbucks-logo-evolution). Is it just me or is the image of a 2 tailed mermaid splaying herself to the world kind of horrific? They did seem to get around the problem of how can you do it with a sexy mermaid if her entire bottom half is a fish tail though. Smart. I also think the fact that starbucks logo is a figure from greek mythology that lures sailors to their death is an odd choice too.

Pet Shop

Gremlins was a pretty dark movie, I watched it at Christmas there and an old lady was fired out the top window to her death on a stair lift. Also the story about how Kate's dad died stuck up the chimney at christmas dressed as santa claus was pretty grim. While on the interwebs i found this on wikipedia.

Since its release, some people have criticized Gremlins as being culturally insensitive. Some observers have commented that the film presents gremlins as African Americans. In Ceramic Uncles & Celluloid Mammies, Patricia Turner writes that the gremlins "reflect negative African-American stereotypes" in their dress and behavior. They are shown "devouring fried chicken with their hands", listening to black music, breakdancing, and wearing sunglasses after dark and newsboy caps, a style common among African American males in the 1980s.

Maybe they were wearing sunglasses because they are allergic to sunlight? Maybe they were eating chicken with their hands because cutlery is pretty difficult for gremlins to figure out. Maybe they're just plain racist yo!

Titanic Avenged

Last year was the 100th anniversary of the sinking of the RMS Titanic. You would think we would celebrate the year that it was built or something rather than the year it sank but hey they didn't make a movie about that so we'll go with the anniversary of the deaths. That would have been quite a different movie though wouldn't it? Leonardo Dicaprio would be hammering rivets into metal for 2 hours 50 feet in the air with no safety harness and what's her face would be eating sugar plums in the Harland and Wolff offices.

Recently they opened a Museum thing about the titanic in Belfast. Check out Pastiebap's review here.

Skullington Boy

Skeletons live inside you. You have 206 bones in your body. This is all I care to say on the matter. If your heath had skeletons you would have little skeletons living in your mouth. If you want to learn more about skeletons go to the wikipedia page, you can see a skeleton man riding a skeleton horse. Thats pretty cool huh? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skeletons

Fallible Infallibility

Pope Eggs Benedict XVI resigned as pope the other day due to health reasons. Is this a sign from god that he doesn't like Ratzinger anymore? Maybe Ratzinger thought he was near death and didn't like the idea of being attacked by the little silver hammer?

'On the death of a pope, the Papal Chamberlain must call out his baptismal name three times and tap his head with a silver hammer before he is officially declared dead'

I found that little nugget of information while googling popes on the inter webs. Interesting stuff. I also found this.

'The most popular papal name has been John, which has been taken by 21 popes. Despite that, the most recent Pope John was John XXIII. The two missing numbers were John XVI, an antipope, and John XX, who never existed but was included in a medieval miscount'.

Who the hell is the anti-pope? Is he some kind of Satan worshiping pope or is it more like anti-pasta? I also found out that while Ratzinger doesn't have a driving licence he does hold a helicopter pilot's licence. 

Sick Joke

Tomorrow is pancake tuesday. The day when we all eat pancakes all day long until we become a pancake. In the olden days we used to just put lemon and sugar on our pancakes but now that America has been invented we put maple syrup on them. We also use the finger as an angry gesture when we used to use 2. These are a couple of examples as to how America is slowly influencing our culture. Soon America will stick a flag in our soil and claim us for their own and no one will stop them as we'll all be too busy eating maple syrup pancakes, calling ladybirds 'ladybugs', wrapping leftovers in 'aloominum' foil and thinking about zeebras as we walk along the 'sidewalk'. Our only hope is that the maple syrup thing is actually a canadian influence and that they will stand and fight with us. It's aboot time they sent those mounties into battle anyway.

The Good, The Fleg and The Ugly

People said that nothing good came out of 'Fleg Gate'. This however is untrue as the above cartoon came out of it and it looks fantastic! Look at the attention to detail! Black beard's hat even has his own flag on it! How about that eh? The ol' protests and the like about Belfast City Council's decision to only fly the union flag on 'special occasions' was a bit of banter to begin with but now it's just got tiresome. Pirates used to lower their flag to catch ships unawares before boarding and doing their pirate business on the poop deck (robbing the occupants I mean). Maybe we could learn a thing or two from this, maybe not. Maybe we should all design our own individual flags and celebrate our differences! We could fly them on our houses so that people would know if they'd like to pop round. If your flag had Master Chief on it gamers would know that they might like to ring your bell and pop round for some Halo

Marie Curie SMASH!

Marie Curie, as you will probably know, is a famous science person. She coined the term radioactivity, discovered radium and participated in the first unicycle marathon (only 2 of these are true). According to the bible, science is evil and this is why when studying radioactivity Marie absorbed a large amount of radiation. According to comic books though this will turn you into a hulk like superhero. Every year I travel to France where Marie Curie is now entombed and wait for her to rise from the grave in her true incredible hulk form and every year I'm disappointed. The drawing above was published in 'Particle Magazine' to show the effects that radiation will have on Marie's body if we only give it enough time.
Marie......I'm still waiting.

Hobbit Holes

I saw ‘The Hobbit’ the other day. Pretty good but pretty long too. They could have shaved a good half an hour off the start. Why do hobbits have hairy feet though?, It’s pretty gross and off putting they could shave some off there too never mind the running time. Even the women I’m assuming have the hairy feet I’m guessing. If they shave their legs do they leave the feet or do the whole thing? Would it not look weird to have hairless legs and hairy feet? I think I’d maybe rather be a dwarf. Their women are apparently as hairy as the men though. It’s puzzlement…. I’ve decided just to be a human.