Holidays

Ever been on holiday? I have. It's great. I went to Spain once and there were all these spanish people there. Why would Spanish people go to Spain on their holidays? Same reason as me I suppose.

Droid Baby

I like BB-8. He looks like a fun guy. He looks like the kind of guy you could go for cocktails with.... and then drink all the cocktails because he doesn't have a mouth. Free cocktails and you  get to hang out with a droid.  It's a win win situation.

Tokyo's Secret

I arrived home from Japan a couple of weeks ago and speaking with the authority of someone who has been in Tokyo for 3 days, I can say for certain that Tokyo's lights are powered by Pokemon. I barely saw a single live Pokemon when I was there so I can only conclude that they are all underground. The Diglets dig the tunnels, Pikachus power the generators, Gyarados keeps the water running to the high tech toilets and Lapras is obviously on loan to Scotland's Loch Ness in exchange for the secrets of their Whisky.

Whoa Nessy.

Whoa Lapras

Avengers Script Meeting

The new biggest film in the world has just been released. I heard that Age of Ultron make at least 20 billion in it's first hour. That may or may not be true. I liked it but it just seemed like over kill. Every scene was just constant fighting and blowing up to the point where I didn't really care. I'm Guessing it's Michael Bay's favourite Marvel film. There were some great bits involving Thor's hammer and anything with the Vision. James Spader as Ultron was great. There just seemed like there wasn't enough story. They added Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch but in such a way that you don't really care about them. Am I looking forward to seeing more of them in the next film?  Meh. Maybe it's one of those films that gets better with a second watch. Maybe it just seems a let down because the first one was so great.

Casual Racism

This particular comic doesn't really say anything about racism. I'm pretty sure white power dudes wouldn't find it offensive. Thats what I'm going for now. Really broad comedy. Even my comics on racism no longer take a stance on the subject for fear of offending people on either side of the racism divide. Is racism good? Is racism bad? That's not for me to decide. Everyone's opinion is valid and should be respected. So please enjoy this comic which in no way provokes any kind of debate on it's subject.

Catch

The trailer for the new Batman vs Superman film is out. You can see it here among other places.
A crappy version leaked last week so Warner Brothers popped the HD version online. It's all dark and moody and there's Daredevil dressed as Batman dressed as a robot. So check it out for yourself.

Polar Bear

I wanted to put a penguin in this picture but penguins live at the south pole. They also live in zoos though but its usually in separate enclosures. I decided to leave the penguin out for realism. I like to keep it real.

50 Shades

It's been quite the while since my last post. I've been busy buying a house and organising a wedding so you can cut me some slack. 50 Shades of Grey is a thing now I guess. People seem to love it as much as Tom Cruise loves running. The world loves it because this rich dude makes this lady his sex slave or something and theres whips and dirty things in it. She has to do what he says in the bedroom or else he wont buy her 'Tess of the D'urbervilles' or something. To be honest I haven't read it or seen the movie so I cant really judge. I looked it up on wikipedia though and found the following:

 'Ana is instantly attracted to Christian, but also finds him intimidating. As a result, she stumbles through the interview and leaves Christian's office believing it went badly. Ana consoles herself by thinking they will never meet again. However, Christian appears at the hardware store where she works. While he purchases various items including cable ties, masking tape and rope'.

This to me sounds like the opening scene to some sort of torture porn horror film like 'Saw', rather than a horrible porn-torture film like 50 Shades. The fact she works in a hardware store (a sexy hardware store?) just makes me think of Weird Al and his awesome 'Hardware Store' song. Heres a link to it on you tube with a music video comprised of My Little Pony clips.  I'd like to discuss how weird this whole video is and the fact that there are grown men called 'Bronies who love and follow the show but theres a documentary on Netflix about that. Enjoy your smut and ponies folks, I'm off to bed.

Cockeye

So we have a trailer for age of ultron and it looks pretty good. Hawkeye even has a big flappy bit on his costume like cockeye does here, hanging down by his legs. My brother Chris and I came up with the idea of cockeye on the train one day much to our amusement. It's taken a while for him to be transformed into a comic but at least we've found a use for hawkeye's old costume. Lets face it, he was never gonna wear that in the movies.

Ok so it's 2 flappy bits but you get what I mean

Frozen

What to say about frozen? Huh. Well it doesn't make a lot of sense for one. A good deal of the characters are annoying. That dude keeps doing a voice for his reindeer which is borderline schizophrenic. Theres not a lot of plot or danger (until the end) and Elsa just acts like a bitch for most of it. Why doesn't anyone just explain to the kids that Elsa's power are too dangerous? Why do her parents lock here away from her sister for at least a decade? It's madness, the whole thing. It's got songs though. Songs which will burrow a hole in your head and lay eggs. Cheers for that Disney. Cheers for letting your terrible move lay eggs in my head. Also it's all snowy so it can be categorised as a christmas movie which means it'll be on T.V. somewhere with its stupid ear worm songs every year. Thanks again Disney you dicks.