Mellow Yellow

Well the Lego movie is out and doing well by all accounts, I've yet to see it but it looks like a lot of fun. Chris Pratt, Will Ferrell, Morgan Freeman, Will Arnett, Charlie Day, Nick Offerman and Elizabeth Banks doing voice work. The animation  looks good too, not too slick. It looks like it was animated by stop motion even though it was computer animated. There's not a lot more to say about a movie I haven't seen so I just hope you enjoy my pee based comic about lego dudes, featuring Benny and Emmet from the movie. If it's yellow, let it mellow.

Ice is Bach

Some facts about Vanilla Ice:
His real name is not Vanilla Ice (shocker) or Matthew Van Winkle. (It's Rob Van Winkle).  He tried to commit suicide with a heroin overdose.  In 1991 he was arrested for threatening a homeless man with a pistol (he had the pistol not the homeless man, he's not crazy)
Some facts about Bach:
He fathered 20 children, pulled a sword on a bassoonist, was jailed for disrespecting the Duke of Weimar and wrote the sheet music for 'Drop it like it's hot'.
So, who's more gangsta? I'll let you decide.
(I may have made one of the facts up)

Hungry Hungry Hunger Games

The hunger games was kinda good. I'll catch the second one on Netflix or something. What would have improved it though would have been some hungry hungry battle hippos like battle cat from masters of the universe. As you can see from the above picture it looks like a lot of fun. I've included a prawn from the movie district 9 because who doesn't want to see one of those guys riding a teal battle hippo? Communists, that's who and I'm sure as he'll not one of those!

Home Alone

Merry Christmas everyone! Home Alone's great isn't it? I mean its terrifyingly violent for a kids move and much more imitate-able than say Call of Duty or something like that. You can't get a hold of explosives or assault rifles that easily but toy cars, string, paint pots, nails? You can create quite the assault course for mummy and daddy when they try and put you to bed. I saw the tail end of Home alone 4 the other day and it was just awful. Instead of just getting a new kid and family and having the same 'kid vs crooks' set up that was the heart of franchise. They felt the need to call the new kid 'Kevin McCallister' even though he looks nothing like him and continue on the story. His parents are split up now and he's staying with his 'Mom' for Christmas. Marv returns for some reason with a female accomplice this time and 'hilarity' ensues in a house twice the size of the mansion from the first movie. Marv is played by Harry from 'Third rock from the sun' (the one with his eyes closed the whole time) and the whole thing plays out like some sort of nightmarish cartoon complete with scooby doo revolving bookcase gag. So if you want to watch some Home Alone when you're home alone this christmas stick to the first 2. Goodnight everyone and remember to drink your ovaltine.

Mohammad

Isn't it weird that Mohammad has the word 'Ham' in it? I thought so even if you didn't. I'm not allowed to tell you if that IS the real Mohammad or not. He could be. Maybe he isn't. If he is then fundamentalists have just cause to butcher me and torch my flesh. If not, then I'm allowed to draw him. What if I did a drawing of him and just drew his clothes because he drank an invisibility potion? It's not a drawing really as you cant see him but I know he's there. wearing those clothes. I'm confused with this whole set up. I'm just going to go draw Moses as that's less hassle.  Enjoy your day.

P.S. If Moses and Mohammad set up a business they could call it Prophets for Profit.

Houdini

Harry Houdini  had a trick where he would take any punch and it wouldn't affect him. Some dudes found him before his show and punched him a load of time before he could tense up ( he agreed to the punching, they didn't ambush him). He carried on with his show that night and then died of a burst appendix. The moral of this tale? If you're not well, don't go to work.  Also no matter what Hagrid from Harry Potter says, you are not a wizard.

Pug Dreams

I have a dog thats not much of a dog. It's the kind of dog that goblins would have if they were real and had dogs. He looks like he's been hit in the face with a shovel and acts like that too. What do Pugs dream of? From the way my dog looks at the TV I reckon he dreams filthy dreams of Rihanna. In his dream world he's an affluent debonair gentlepug who smokes cigarettes with a cigarette holder and wears a smoking jacket. He can pull the ladies in a similar manner to Brian from Family Guy (That dog is always pulling human chicks, whats up with that?). In real life though he's barely a dog.

Heisenburgers

Breaking Bad may be over but the internet still exists so you know what that means! Infinite Breaking Bad content! Forever! Here's a poster for Walt and Jessie's Burger shop. Their meat is 95% pure don't ya know! Word is that they're coming to a town near you, selling burgers from a specially kitted out RV!

Goonies never say die

This comic makes me think that they should bring out a goonies board game where you have to avoid the fratellis and find one eyed willie's treasure map and treasure. You could pick any character from the whole gang and it's be fun for the whole family! A mini game would involve being chunk and having to truffle shuffle yourself thin like the guy who played him in real life!

Randal and Dante's Inferno

The Divine Comedy which features the story of Dante's journey through hell with Virgil is not a very funny one. There are all kinds of people being buried alive and drowning in pits of tar etc. that sort of put a dampener on the whole jolly jape. I'd recommend the film 'Clerks' rather than the inferno as far as laughs per minute go. The Inferno does have more daemons and monsters in it but it's unfortunately lacking a game of hockey on the roof. Both are in black and white though so don't let that sway you.